How Did He Know?

I just got this reminder a while ago from my dentist. The guy's got ESP, I swear. We have a lot of garlic. And brushing isn't enough to get rid of it. Especially not with my toothbrush. Wait a minute, duh! He's worked on my mouth before. He knows! I am so slow. It's just sleep deprivation though. That's what I love about going to the dentist, you can take a nap. So your mouth has to be stretched as far as it will go and beyond, but if you've got sleep deprivation, that's not going to matter so much. It will be way easier than trying to sleep with your kids around, and a whole lot safer.
SO, I got a new toothbrush. Why? Because someone sabotaged mine. Toothbrushes are playthings at my house too. They are often found plugging up the drain hole to the bathroom sink. So considerate of D&D to not let the water drain into the cabinet below the sink* but onto the floor instead when they fill it up after they plug the sink itself up with t.p. or soap or anything else handy, because we don't have a regular plug, because they figured out how to remove not only the plug, but the whole entire mechanism that raises and lowers the plug. That was at least a year or two ago, but it's still not fixed. Just like I don't have a closet door (See picture of G. below) since J. used it on someone else's closet when he was fixing things up for them and that was at least 8 years ago. ANYHOW, back to the toothbrush. I go to brush my teeth, so unsuspectingly, and it tastes like Bertie Bott's vomit flavored beans. Plus, it was scratchy. Turns out that someone was trying to cut the head off the brush, but didn't do much more than scratch up the surface enough to make very rough sandpaper out of it. I don't even want to know what was on the toothbrush. It took everything in me not to barf for the next 15 minutes or so.
I really need to make that dentist appointment soon. At least he didn't dis me. At least not yet. How many people get dissed by their dentist? I'm too big a challenge, I guess. I tried to make an appointment for about a year before I gave up and changed to a new one. Then J. starts getting mail from the old dentist inviting HIM to make an appointment. I feel so loved.
And in case you were waiting with bated breath, YES, G. broke his tail bone on that slippery bathroom tile. Luckily it's just cracked, so it's supposed to heal on it's own.

*(I know it wouldn't, but this is their reasoning)