When the weather thaws and the sun warms the earth, the insects emerge again. Soon, the children are spending their days in the yard, digging, chasing bugs, playing with the neighbors. They come in and out, getting drinks, toys, popsicles. Rarely does the door shut behind them. Soon, there is a colony of flies zooming around the house.
One day I ask, "Son, where's the fly swatter?"
He responds, ""Wha swysatter?"
"It's the stick with a floppy square at the top you hit flies with."
"Oh, I no catch like that." he says.
So true. In our house, there are two kinds of flyswatters, the regular kind you buy at the store, and the human flyswatters. You might think the traditional flyswatter is more effective, but if your flyswatter looks like this,
you might prefer the human kind.
I'd like to introduce you to the Fly Whisperer. You've all heard of the Horse Whisperer and the Dog Whisperer, but I bet you've never heard of the Fly Whisperer. Since he was two, going on three, he's been catching flies. We can't explain how. Both he and his brother love bugs, hunt them down all over the yard, overturning rocks and stepping stones, digging and catching them with nets and cups. There is no fear. They love dragging them into the house to share their room for a while. They love books about all kinds of insects. But, how did the Fly Whisperer learn his trade? I don't know. Instinct, maybe?
His dad believes he hypnotizes them. "See how he follows them with his eyes? He watches and waits closely until the fly stops within reach, then he snatches it before it knew what was coming. Why doesn't the fly just fly away like it would with the rest of us?" He hypnotizes them with his eyes while they buzz around." Who knows?
Then his impy brother learned his trade. Once a fly he was holding by the leg broke loose, leaving the leg behind. That was all it took to start the fly circus. He thought of clipping their wings so all they could do is run around in his hand. Mom did not approve. She has visions of B-movie over-sized flies seeking their revenge. (Mom also wants little fly whisperers to wash their hands!)
So, If you're a fly in my house, for your sake, I hope the original fly whisperer catches you and takes you outside. If you're a human mom trying to get rid of flies, sorry, the Fly Whisperer is mine!